During this time God has really urged me to look at the friendships that I have and reflect on what a beautiful and wonderful gift it is. I suppose that is because I have never really been grateful for my friendships- I mean if I am just being honest. I may have liked hanging out with certain people or even talking to them on the phone every once in a while. But the truth is my relationships were very shallow. I mean I had a shirt that I made with some friends one time that said:
“I am the most shallow person I know.”
Oh- did you get caught up in the fact that we used to make our own shirts?!? I know- Mall kiosks were hot spots back then. Don’t judge.
The shirt was actually pretty accurate though. I was shallow. I didn’t really want to open myself up to other people because that could potentially lead to getting hurt. I wasn’t willing to risk that. So I played it off by keeping conversations light and fun. And I will tell you- I became an expert at shallow friendships.
It has taken years of prayer and asking God to bring women into my life that could show me what real friendship looks like. Some women have been in my life for years I had just never opened myself up to a deeper relationship, then Jesus opened a door for that. Some God brought me more recently, but it feels like we have known each other forever. I can look at my life now and see an answered prayer when I think of the incredible women God has surrounded me with.
Women who get the honor of having a front row seat to my uncut, and unfiltered crazyness. Friends that I have to call and say “meet me at the park later today because if I don’t get out of the house with these kids of mine, you are going to see me on the evening news.” Friends I can have a melt down with, be sarcastic with, be quiet with--yea right. Never happens. But if I wanted to, they would let me. Sharing hopes, dreams, fears, and desires. Asking for advice on walking out my relationship with Jesus, my kids, my husband. Women who I can call and say “hello” and the tone of my voice says to them “something is off. What’s going on with you today?”
And women who will go to battle spiritually for me. Praying when I really don’t have the energy to do it for myself. In a million years I never thought this would be my life.
Friendships seem harder and harder to come by these days. A Facebook friend does not actually equal a real friend. A public tweet to someone doesn’t take the place of a phone call or visit. Friendships take more than liking someones picture or as my nephew says giving someone a “double tap” on Instagram. Deep friendships take big investments. They must be fought for, prayed over, and nourished.
Has God blessed you with these types of relationships? If so, give thanks. And call your friends and tell them how grateful you are for them. If this is something your heart desires, I know exactly how you feel. I have been there. And I urge you to pray and ask God to bring those relationships into your life. He will. I am living proof that He will. You just need an open heart to receive them when He does bring them.
So thank you to all of my friends who put up with me. Who listen to me rant for hours about nothing that I think is something. Who invite me to a surprise party at Alamo Drafthouse for a Zoolander Quote A Long. Who allow me to then volunteer myself for a traditional Runway Walk Off in front of a room of total strangers. You are the absolute best and worst all at the same time.
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