Adopted In Love

My son Beck is 2 1/2 years old. Beck never had the chance to meet my step dad Rodger. The very last time I saw Rodger was when I was hugging him to tell him I was in labor and headed to the hospital to have Beck. Sweet Rodg was pretty sick by that point. Each day I would walk in to see him he would look at my stomach and sigh, anxiously awaiting Beck’s arrival. I sent pictures from the hospital when Beck was born and Rodger was able to see him. By morning the next day Rodger had slipped into a sleep that he would never come out of. He sure did hang on to make sure he saw Beck on this side of heaven though. 

And what is so interesting about all of this is that Beck LOVES his Papa. His Papa he has only seen in pictures. He always tells me how much he misses him. He will even wake in the morning and tell me funny things Rodger tells him. I will ask where he saw him and he says “I saw him in Heaven, where he lives.” Maybe his dreams are of him, I don’t know. As my friend Dana says “I can’t begin to understand all of the wonderful mysteries of God.” Me neither.

What I do know is that Beck has a love for the outdoors, an addiction to music, and an obsession with 4-wheelers. Pretty much his Papa in a small, Mexican body. 

Rodger was always my step dad. Meaning, he never adopted me legally. There was no reason for him to. I have a dad who is and always has been very present in my life. He is one of the greatest men I know. So I just got an extra Dad. I know- some people really are just that lucky. 

So I was not Rodger’s daughter “on paper” nor was I his daughter by blood. But in love he adopted me as his own. And because of that I grew to be more like him. I grew a love for the mountains that remains deep in my heart today, just like him. I fell in love with the country and the desire to live off the land like he did. I learned how to be more encouraging, more understanding and more kind, because of him. Some of it I learned by things he said to me. But a lot of it I learned by spending time with him. Lots and lots of time. We would sit in his workshop for hours upon hours talking when I was younger. And it is those moments that I cherish most. It is those moments my heart grew, learned, changed. I never had to do anything. I just had to be there. 

I was thinking about Rodger this morning as we near Christmas and I miss him terribly. I was thinking about how his adopting me in love not only changed me, but changed my kids. Beck has similar desires and characteristics of Rodger who has no blood relation to him what so ever. He never even met him. But love transcends all those lines. And then I realized how blessed I was to experience that twice in my life. 

Jesus adopted me as his daughter. And because of it, my life is forever changed. My kids are forever changed. The more time I spend with him, the more I become like him. The more my kids become like him. His desires become my desires. I see characteristics of him in my son and daughter. The lineage of my family goes straight to Jesus and his love that rescued me. And just like Rodger my heart changes and grows from what he tells me in his word, and from hours and hours together with him. 

Praising Jesus tonight as I look at my life, sometimes filled with tragedy and pain and yet undeniable, breathtaking, healing beauty in the middle of all of it.